My Little Gnudren
Today Old Gnu wants to talk to you about the Resurrection. You find it recorded in the Bible, a book you should be reading because, like granny, most of you are at the age when you should be cramming for finals. The best explanation old Gnu has ever read on the Resurrection comes in this wee book:
In the space of 39 pages [pp61-99] of spaced-out large print in plain English, i.e., no big words or academic jargon, former Archbish Rowan, now Lord Oystermouth, tells me all that I need to know about the Resurrection in an inspiring way. The whole book has only 106 pages. You can buy it second-hand for a couple of pounds. You can also buy books on the meaning of the cross and resurrection that have 488 pages or even a 1000, but life is short if you are cramming for finals. Lord Oystermouth writes that it was once fashionable to regard the Resurrection Stories as unreliable because of differences in the 4 accounts of the Gospels. He then adds, “But when you think about it the very untidiness of the stories is one of the main reasons for taking them seriously as historical reportage.”
Old Gnu wants to share with you the account of the Resurrection that he finds humorously joyful. [No, these are not Lord Oystermouth’s thoughts, but Old Gnu’s.] It’s found in Matthew 28. Gnu’s main aim is to get you to understand what Matthew is saying, and not to convince you of anything if you are agnostic.
Let’s start. Matthew is the only Gospel that tells us that a guard of Roman soldiers was put on the tomb because of the demand of the religious leaders. And therefore, it is poignant that he makes a point of telling us that an Angel of the Lord descended from heaven rolled back the stone and sat upon it – thus busting the dictates of the Roman Seal stuck to it. Old Gnu doesn’t know how much Angels weigh, but the stone was heavy enough on its own. So, shutting up the stone again would certainly be possible, but with an Angel sitting on it, might prove difficult.
Gnu has tried to find this dramatic moment in Art, but in his opinion the representations discovered so far don’t do it anywhere near justice.
In this first picture the Angel doesn’t look anything like mighty or someone who would terrify Roman soldiers so they fall down like dead people. Rather she/he looks like a fairy princess.
Nul points.
The second representation is slightly better at one level but leaves one thinking that there is a shortage of underwear in heaven.
No wonder the women are averting their eyes, and the soldiers look as if they are stunned by his lack of attire.
.
And the third representation leaves one thinking that the Angel is a native of Salt Lake City in Utah
Back to the Angel in Matthew 28. He came down, literally stepped down [ καταβὰς], from heaven and did something extremely disrespectful. He sat on the stone. Not a good idea; resist sitting on tombstones when walking through graveyards my little Gnudren, unless you’re sure there’s no one underneath it. You don’t know who it will offend. It’s not appropriate behaviour. And you’d expect someone who stepped down from heaven to be better behaved, but perhaps he didn’t like that stone very much.
The next thing the Angel did was to give an answer, presumably to a question or a statement:
But the angel answered and said to the women…. [v.5]. Old Gnu is minded of the radio programme I’m Sorry I haven’t a Clue, where occasionally the contestants are given an answer and they have to guess what the question is. But the Angel was very clever he knew the question, but did not let on in his next remark which was: Do not be afraid! Perhaps the REB [Revised English Bible] gives the best translation of this: “You”, he said, “have nothing to fear”. The force of this statement is to be seen in the context of the corpse like bodies of terrified Roman soldiers lying around. They had plenty to be afraid about and were playing dead. There was no need for the women to copy them.
I know [ οἶδα literally I have perceived] you are seeking for Jesus… Aha the angel had perceived the women might ask about the whereabouts of Jesus.
Well at this point the Angel was partly guilty of giving them misinformation: Go quickly and tell his disciples he is risen and going before you into Galilee. There you will see him. Behold I have told you! [Or better That is what I came to tell you!] [v.7] Fair enough. But v.8 says, And as they went to tell his disciples, behold Jesus met them saying, ‘Greetings’ [Gk. Χαίρετε literally Rejoice, be joyful]. It seems Jesus can’t contain himself and wait till he’s in Galilee. Is Jesus out of control?! Well certainly the love of God is out of control. He/She, old Gnu believes, wants everyone to be happy. Can we help this notion that God has taken to her/his head along a bit further?
Vetus Pater Gnu
Academiae Musicorum et Theologia
Turris LA
VI Mensis Martii MMXXIII